Oh beautiful town

I grew up blind,
just like everyone's child,
in the warmth of milk and deceit,
smothered by love and the chemical dust,
there was never enough to believe.

They chewed me up,
they spat me out,
of their system and onto their street,
and the rest of my life was a sprint to forget all the greatness that could never be.

Oh beautiful town,
I remember you blacker than the night,
the poised and the sick mouth, the bad taste and the neon lights,
oh beautiful town,
where are you now with your binge insecurities?
I shot you down beautiful town because you tear your children into pieces.

Absence twisted with fondness is the horror I couldn't forget,
programmed into great art of family, lies and debts,
too much expectation followed by hope and then hate and the rest,
and the rest of my life was a glorious test of my will and my selfish neglect.

Oh beautiful town,
I remember you blacker than the night,
the poised and the sick mouth of the bad taste and the neon lights,
oh beautiful town,
where are you now with your binge insecurities?
I shot you down beautiful town because you tear your children into pieces.

In the floorboards under insolent feet,
I mapped the hopscotch to my parents retreat
with lavender bag in my hand, words of desperation on my tongue:
goodnight father, goodnight mother
Are u still awake.