Patricia the Stripper

She works downtown in an unmarked bar,
flyin' ‘round poles
She always gave me the fright of my life
I didn't mean to get involved,
it was the alcohol mixed with and empty feeling inside

It’s such a bad idea
to fall in love with
a lady of the night

Why didn't God give her two left feet,
then she couldn't run away from me?

Months go by and I'm alone in bed
While she's greasing up
for when the businessmen and lawyers arrive
I've got to wear a beard, suit and tie to get past the door
if I want to see my girl tonight

I go to all this effort
just to see my fair Patricia
going home with some other guy?

Why didn't God give her two left feet,
then she couldn't run away from me?
Why didn't God give her two left feet,
then she couldn't run away from me?

She thinks I'm sad and that's alright
But she doesn't hate me so there's my little alibi
I can't, I can't leave, I can't, I can't, I can't,
She's my coked up botox girl

Patricia, Patricia...
Oh Patricia the Stripper, you are my sunshine
Oh Patricia the Stripper, come on home tonight
Oh Patricia the Stripper, you are my sunshine,
so why can't you come home with me tonight?