The Infomercial rap

eah they call me time bomb and I stay up till 2
Just watching tv, got nothin better to do
I got it where i want ya right next to the phone
I buy products direct conveniently at home
Flippin through the channels, all the good stuff is on
Its great im entertained till I have to work at dawn
I finally found the answer man extenze is da bomb
I dialed in the number but please dont tell my mom

Thats it come on boys were going to bed
Were not done! Until I see my favorite one!

You know me, I had to get a magic bullet
I wouldve even bought it from a guy with a mullet
Are you kidding? Just a payment of 4 times 9?
Aww ya man I use mine all the time
Ill make you a fruit salad or a dang quesadilla
Even a milkshake if the flavas vanilla
Thats right, its easy as 1, 2, 3
Youre gonna love my special sauce itll set you free

Ive always had a problem people call me a klutz
I get a new case of mildew every three months
But then I knew this yellow towel is where its at
The Germans make good stuff everyone knows that
Sham Wow has me saying wow everytime
This thing absorbs cola coffee and wine
Why spend 20 bucks on paper towels each week
Ring it out and youre done thats it just repeat

Im Laying in the bed I wanna get some sleep
Feel like ive been awake since early last week
O no I have forgotten to turn the lights down
But then I recalled something that flipped my frown
I was smart enough to get me a clapper WOW
I used to get up for nothin well check me out now
and im sure there are a few of you who think its a con
but Im gonna laugh at all of you and shout clap on

Ya I got the gazelle only a month ago
Id been feeling fat for three years or so
Subway had betrayed me with the great Jared plan
I must have been wider than half a Trans Am
But with the many screams of you can do it
I knew I had to breakdown and bite the bullet
Now Ive lost 300 pounds and Im feeling well
I owe It all to the great Tony Littles Gazelle

You know I started when I couldnt lift up the trash
And impressing ladies takes a little muscle and cash
I had my eye on a girl but she was still with him
Knew I had to upgrade and get the iron gym
yeeeaAAAhhhyyah In no time I was feeling phenomenal
All this new muscle with a 6 pack abdominal
She still rejected me because I never leave my home
Well that sucks, darn it...