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Meryl:
Things have come to a pretty pass,
Our romance is growing flat.
Sting:
For you like this and the other
While I go for this and that.
Meryl:
Goodness knows what the end will be,
Oh, I don't know where I'm at...
Together:
It looks as if we two will never be one,
Something must be done.
Sting:
You say eether and I say eyether,
Meryl:
I say nyther and you say neether,
Together:
Eether, eyether, neether, nyther,
Let's call the whole thing off!
Meryl:
I like potahto and you like potato,
Sting:
You like tomato and I like tomahto,
Together:
Potato, potahto, tomato, tomahto!
Let's call the whole thing off!
Meryl:
But oh! If we call the whole thing off,
Then we must part.
Sting:
And oh! If we ever part,
Then that might break my heart!
Meryl:
So, if you like pajamas and I like pajahmas,
Sting:
I'll wear pajamas and give up pajahmas.
Together:
For we know we need each other,
So we better call the calling off off.
Let's call the whole thing off!
Sting:
You say laughter and I say lawfter,
Meryl:
You say after and I say awfter,
Together:
Laughter, lawfter, after, awfter,
Let's call the whole thing off!
Meryl:
You like vanilla and I like vanella,
Sting:
You, sa's'parilla and I sa's'parella,
Together:
Vanilla, vanella, Choc'late, strawb'ry!
Let's call the whole thing off!
Meryl:
But oh! If we call the whole thing off,
Then we must part.
Sting:
And oh! If we ever part,
Then that might break my heart!
Meryl:
So, if you go for oysters and I go for ersters
Sting:
I'll order oysters and cancel the ersters.
Together:
For we know we need each other,
So we better call the calling off off!
Let's call the whole thing off!
Let's call the whole thing off!