Christmas Bells

FIVE HOMELESS PEOPLE
Christmas bells are ringing
Christmas bells are ringing
Christmas bells are ringing
On TV - At Saks
SQUEEGIEMAN
Honest living, honest living
Honest living, honest living
Honest living, honest living
ALL FIVE HOMELESS
Can't you spare a dime or two
Here but for the grace of God go you
You'll be merry
I'll be merry
Tho Merry ain't in my vocabulary
No sleighbells
No Santa Claus
No yule log
No tinsel
No holly
Ho hearth
No
SOLOIST
'Rudolph the red nosed reindeer'
ALL FIVE
Rudolph the red nosed reindeer
No room at the Holiday Inn - oh no
And it's beginning to snow
VENDORS
Hats, bats, shoes, booze
Mountain bikes, potpourri
Leather bags, girlie mags
Forty fives, AZT
VENDOR #1
No one's buying
Feel like crying
ALL
No room at the Holiday Inn - Oh no
And it's beginning to snow
VENDOR #2
How about a fur-
In perfect shape
Owned by an MBA from uptown
I got a tweed
Broken in by a greedy
Broker who went broke
And then broke down
COLLINS
You don't have to do this
ANGEL
Hush your mouth, it's Christmas
COLLINS
I do not deserve you, Angel
COLLINS ANGEL
Give - Give Wait - What's on the floor?
All you do Let's see some more
Is give
Give me some way to show No - no - no
How you've touched me so
ANGEL
Kiss me - It's beginning to snow
MARK
. . .She said, 'Would you light my candle'
And she put on a pout
And she wanted you
To take her out tonight?
ROGER
Right
MARK
She got you out!
ROGER
She was more than okay
But I pushed her way
It was bad - I got mad
And I had to get her out of my sight
MARK
Wait, wait, wait - You said she was sweet
ROGER
Let's go eat I'll just get fat
It's the one vice left - When you're dead meat
There - That's her
MARK
Maureen?
ROGER
Mimi!
MARK
Wo!
ROGER
I should go
BOTH
Hey - it's beginning to snow
COPS
I'm dreaming of a white Christmas
MIMI & JUNKIES
Follow the man - follow the man
With his pockets full of the jam
Follow the man - follow the man
Help me out, daddy
If you can
Got any D man?
THE MAN
I'm cool
MIMI & JUNKIES
Got any C man?
THE MAN
I'm cool
MIMI & JUNKIES
Got any X
Any smack
Any horse
Any jugie boogie boy
Any blow?
ROGER
Hey
MIMI
Hey
ROGER
I just want to say
I'm sorry for the way -
MIMI
Forget it
ROGER
I blew up
Can I make it up to you?
MIMI
How?
ROGER
Dinner party?
MIMI
That'll do
THE MAN
Hey lover boy - cutie pie
You steal my client - you die
ROGER
You didn't miss me - you won't miss her
You'll never lack for customers
JUNKIES
I'm willin'
I'm illin'
I gotta get my sickness off
Gotta run, gotta ride
Gotta gun, gotta hide - Gotta go
THE MAN
And it's beginning to snow
BENNY
Wish me luck Alison
The protest is on
COAT VENDOR JUNKIES
L.L. Bean Got any C man?
Geoffrey Beene Got any D man?
Burburry zip out Got any B man?
Lining Got any Crack?
Got any X?
SQUEEGIEMAN
Honest living -
ROGER
Mark, this is Mimi -
MARK/MIMI
Hi
ROGER
She'll be dining - (With us)
COAT VENDOR
Here's a new arrival
THE MAN
That is an ounce
VENDORS
Hates, dats, bats
COLLINS
That's my coat!
COAT VENDOR
We give discounts
MARK
I think we've met
ANGEL
Let's get a better one
COLLINS
It's a sham
MIMI
That's what he said
THE MAN
I said it's a gram!
COLLINS
But she's a thief!
ANGEL
But she brought us together
BENNY
Which investor is coming??
COLLINS
I'll take the leather
BENNY
Your father? - Damn!
HOMELESS & VENDORS
Christmas bells are swinging
Christmas bells are ringing
Christmas bells are singing
In my dreams - next year
Once you donate you can go
Celebrate in Tuckahoe
You'll feel cheery
I'll feel cheery
Tho' I don't really know that theory
No bathrobe
No Steuben glass
No cappuccino makers
No pearls, no diamonds
No 'Chestnuts roasting on an open fire'
Chestnuts roasting on an open fire
No room at the Holiday Inn - Oh no
COPS
I'm dreaming of a white Christmas
Just like the ones I used to know
Jingle bells - prison cells
Fa la la la - Fa la la la
You have the right to remain
Silent night holy night
Fall on your knees oh night divine
You'll do some time
Fa la la la la
Fa la la la la
JUNKIES
Got any C man?
Got any D man?
Got any B man?
Got any X - Crack?
I'm willin' - I'm illin'
Gotta get my sickness off
C-D help me
Follow the man - follow the man
Follow the man
Jugie boogie - jugie boogie
Follow the man - follow the man
Any crack, any X, any jugie boogie boy
Got any D man, got any C man
Got any crack - any X - any jugie boogie?
COAT VENDOR
Twenty five
ANGEL
Fifteen
COAT VENDOR
Twenty five
ANGEL
Fifteen
COAT VENDOR
Twenty five
ANGEL
Fifteen
COAT VENDOR
No way
Twenty four
ANGEL
Fifteen
COAT VENDOR
Twenty four
ANGEL
Fifteen
COAT VENDOR
Twenty four
ANGEL
Fifteen
COAT VENDOR
Not today
Twenty three
ANGEL
Fifteen
COAT VENDOR
Twenty three
ANGEL
Fifteen
COAT VENDOR
Twenty three
ANGEL
Fifteen
It's old
COAT VENDOR
Twenty two
ANGEL
Fifteen
COAT VENDOR
Twenty one
ANGEL
Fifteen
COAT VENDOR
Seventeen
ANGEL
Fifteen
COAT VENDOR
Fifteen
ANGEL & COAT VENDOR
Sold!
MARK & ROGER
Let's
go
to
the lot - Maureen's performing
MIMI
Who's Maureen?
ROGER
His ex
MARK
But I am over her
ROGER
Let's not hold hands yet
MIMI
Is that a warning?
ALL THREE
He/You/I
Just need(s)
to take it slow
I should tell you I should tell you
I should tell you I should tell you
I should tell you I. . .
ALL
And it's beginning to
And it's beginning to
And it's beginning to ---
MAUREEN
Joanne, which way to the stage!
ALL
Snow!!!