The Walrus And The Carpenter

TWEEDLE DUM:
The sun was shining on the sea
Shining with all his might

TWEEDLE DEE:
He did his very best to make
The billows smooth and bright

TWEEDLE DUM:
And this was odd because it was

BOTH:
The middle of the night

The Walrus and the Carpenter
Were walking close at hand
The beach was wide
From side to side
But much too full of sand

CARPENTER:
Mr. Walrus

TWEEDLE DEE:
Said the Carpenter

CARPENTER:
My brain begins to perk
We'll sweep this clear in 'alf a year
If you don't mind the work

WALRUS:
Work?! The time has come

TWEEDLE DUM:
The Walrus said

WALRUS:
To talk of other things
Of shoes and ships and sealing wax
Of cabbages and kings
And why the sea is boiling hot
And whether pigs have wings
Calloo-Callay
No work today!
We're cabbages and kings

Oh, uh, Oysters, come and walk with us
The day is warm and bright
A pleasant walk
A pleasant talk
Would be a sheer delight

CARPENTER:
Yes, should we get hungry on the way
We'll stop and, uh, have a bite

TWEEDLE DEE:
But Mother Oyster winked her eye
And shook her heavy head
She knew too well
This was no time to leave her Oyster bed

MOTHER OYSTER:
The sea is nice,
Take my advice
And stay right here

TWEEDLE :
Mum said

WALRUS:
Yes, yes, of course, of course, but, uh, ha, ha
The time has come, my little friends
To talk of other things
Of shoes and ships and sealing wax
Cabbages and kings
And why the sea is boiling hot
And whether pigs have wings, ha ha
Callo-Callay
Come, run away
With cabbages and kings!

Well, now, uh, let me see
Ah, a loaf of bread is what we chiefly need!

CARPENTER:
Listen, how 'bout some pepper and salt and vinegar, eh?

WALRUS:
Well, yes, yes, splendid idea, ha ha!
Very good, indeed
Now, if you're ready, Oysters, dear
We can begin the feed

OYSTERS:
Feed?!

WALRUS:
Oh, yes, the time has come, my little friends
To talk of food and things

CARPENTER:
Of peppercorns and mustard seeds
And other seasonings!
We'll mix 'em all together
In a sauce that's fit for kings
Calloo-Callay
We'll eat today
Like cabbages and kings!

WALRUS:
I, uh, weep for you. I (hic), oh excuse me
I deeply sympathise
For I've enjoyed your company, oh much more
Than you realize

CARPENTER:
Little Oysters? Little Oysters?

TWEEDLE DEE & DUM:
But answer, there came none
And this was scarcely odd because
They'd been eaten
Every one!

With cabbages and kings!