Jack Sparrow

[INTRO]
Intercom: Guys, Michael Bolton is here.
Andy: Oh great, send him in.
Michael: Hey guys
All: Hey thanks for coming.
Andy: How's it goin'?
Michael: I'm really sorry I'm late. I just got caught up watching the
Pirates of the Caribbean marathon. Have you seen those things?
All: Oh yeah, those are great.
Michael: Well I listened to your track and I loved it, and I wrote you
this big, sexy hook I think you're gonna really dig.
Andy: Oh wow, that's great. You wanna just lay it down?
Michael: Boys lets get to it (to it to it to it)

[ANDY]
Here we go
Uh, Lonely Island, Michael Bolton (Michael: YEAH)
(The night starts now)
Together on track, The boys are back
(The night starts now)
The night starts now, baby, roll with us
Chickies snappin' at the neck when we rollin' up (Michael: Rollin'up!)
Club front doors ain't no holdin' up
Black card at the bar like I gives a fuck (Michael: Come on!)

[JORMA]
It's The Lonely Island
Welcome to the set
Some fellas lookin' jealous
Play that back and get wet (Michael: YEAH YEAH)
Gun at my waist, shank in my sock
You either get cut, get stuffed, or get shot

[MICHAEL]
This is the tale of Captain Jack Sparrow
Pirate so brave on the seven seas (Andy: What?)
A mystical quest to the island of Tortuga
Raven locks sway on the ocean breeze

[AKIVA]
Yeah, that was kinda weird but we're back in the club
Buyin' up the bar so the groupies show us love
(Michael: Keira Knightley!)
Motherfuckin' iceman, I'm the top gunna
Heater on blast, I'm the number one stunna (Michael: Jack Sparrow!)

[ANDY]
Watch your girl because I ain't your mister nice guy
More like the meet ya take you home and fuck you twice guy
All dressed up with nowhere to run
I know I make you feel crazy when I---
(Michael: Now back to the good part!!!)

[MICHAEL]
The day he was born, he yearned for adventure (Andy: NO!)
Ol' Captain Jack, givin' them what for (Jorma: Yeah)
He's the pauper of the surf, the jester of Tortuga
But in Davy Jones locker, what lies in store?
(Akiva: Yeah, we've seen the movie)

[ANDY]
Put your hands in the air and say hell yeah

[MICHAEL]
Captain Jack (Andy: What?)
Johnny Depp (Andy: No)

[JORMA]
Saying we count stacks c'mon

[MICHAEL]
Davy Jones (Jorma: Nope)
Giant squid (Jorma: Wrong)

[AKIVA]
Michael Bolton, we're really gonna need you to focus up

[MICHAEL]
Roger that let me try it with another film (Andy: Wait)
Life is a box of chocolates and my name is Forrest Gump (Andy: Not better)
Though I'm not the sharpest tool in the shed
I give Jenny all my love (Akiva: Come ON)

Okay, then I'm a legal aid
Erin Brockovich is my name (Akiva: Oh god)
Then you can call me Scarface
Snortin' mountains of cocaine (Andy: Close enough)

You cockroaches wanna play rough?
Okay, I'm reloaded! HA HA!

This is the tale of Tony Montana (This is the tale!)
Cubano flame, with Miami nuts
Got a basehead wife, her womb is polluted
This whole town's a pussy, just waiting to get fucked!
(Just waiting to get fucked!)
(Andy: Okay it turns out Michael Bolton is a major cinephile)
You complete me (Andy: Yeah, yeah okay)